Budget : My Life’s on a Budget

Telling someone that you’re on a budget used to feel like you were telling them you’re broke, or you mismanaged your finances, or living poor or? Fortunately, that’s not the case anymore in most people’s minds. Budgeting is taking responsibility for your finances, being a good steward of your income, careful management, and, I think learning how to separate wants from needs and create savings vs. spending.

That said, growing up in the seventies, people’s finances were a private thing. No one discussed anything about money unless they were sitting at the kitchen table with their spouse or discussing operating loans in their local bank.

My husband and I got married in the mid-nineties. We are from completely different backgrounds and grew up in completely different households where finances were managed far, far differently from one another. I grew up in a very, very conservative family–once my mother remarried (prior to that we were essentially homeless for 7–1/2 years). From age 8 years until h.s. graduation, I grew up on a farm. I’ve lived almost 52 years in the Midwest and all of them in rural farming communities. I am a country gal through and through and love the Midwest. My husband grew up in Europe and then moved to WI when he was 7–1/2 years old. His father was a military officer, as well as a very well-educated and successful engineer.

Their summer vacations were in Europe and mine were ice cream cones at the local A & W. His family was what my family called affluent. He grew up very privileged, and I grew up very poor to lower middle class. It should not be underestimated how difficult it is to marry someone with totally different views on finances.

We didn’t discuss money until a few years ago (we’ve been married 30 years). I handled all the finances–paid every bill, dealt with every bill collector, built and watched our credit scores go up and crash down, time and again, with little more than an occasional “can we afford this?” from hubby. It’s the way it once was with us.
Now, fast-forward thirty years, and we’ve had that conversation, though, I’ll admit, hubby is still of the mind–bullet points only. Suffice it to say, we are both on the same page when it comes to budget. We are at a place in our lives where time, abilities, health, how many tomorrows are left are front and center of our decisions. Now, realistically, any one of these things can be a part of the discussion at any age, but they usually aren’t. Once a person hits close to retirement age, it would be almost impossible and terribly silly not to include these things in the conversation. We want our own home again and I never, ever, want to have to rent from someone as long as I’m alive, again. We have to get a newer car–our 17-year-old car will not last forever no matter how much we need it to.

My firmest belief is that one must be prepared for anything. I know, I know, you can’t prepare for everything, but do everything that you can think of, can afford, can prepare for, put up, put aside, be proactive for yourself and your family. If you can, be generous with others and help them prepare with either words or actions and, if you’re able to–preparations.

Gather together with your loved ones and decide your priorities. In doing so, try to make your decisions based from the right now to tomorrow to some date in the distance to far off in the distance. Never assume that certain things can’t or won’t happen to you. Some things will surprise you and, by luck, maybe fate, others won’t affect you.

Budgeting, preparing, being prepared for anything aren’t dirty words. Having plan b and even plan c are essential. Budgeting your income can make it possible to be able to afford to live when a crisis hits, or an unexpected event, and emergency. Learning how to live for less may provide you with skills that are priceless. Trust me. I learned more while living poor, about finances, than I ever learned in 8 years of college while studying about it.

When our income was essentially cut in half within just a few months, I never believed that we could make it as well as we have. Though I am still concerned about the time left to save for our own home and my retirement in 5 or so years, I am optimistic that we will be able to afford something in the way of a home that is a better investment and more affordable for us than our current situation. Learning how to decide between wants and needs has been a great learning experience for us. Challenging ourselves to grocery shop and find the best buys has taught us some skills that only our experience could have afforded us.

No one knows what tomorrow will bring. The best that you can do is make sure that you are a responsible steward of your household’s income by spending it wisely; spending it on needs vs wants. You can also strengthen yourself and family for any situation that may occur by being prepared. The more skills that you learn regarding survival, resiliency, preparedness, and planning, the better chances you and your family have against all the unknowns.

Until next time,

xoxo